Feminism

Dear Madame Toujours,

I am very hurt by the anti-feminist attitudes of all my friends. They have always gone on and on about women supporting each other and sticking up for each other and standing up to oppression. Then, out of the blue, they have all turned against me.

It started with Beverly telling Lacey about the night I got Lacey's husband drunk and seduced him. Suddenly, Lacey isn't speaking to me anymore. Then Lacey's husband told her Anne's husband told him about my six-month affair with him--which is just the kind of abuse and harassment I would expect from a man, but then can you believe Lacey actually told Anne, and the two of them told everyone else? I trusted these women and now half the women in the group won't talk to me anymore.

Please say a word about the importance of women sticking together.

Sincerely,

Disappointed Feminist

Chere Mlle. Disappointed,

Possibly, you are experiencing the very common confusion about the feminisms. Once upon the time long, long ago, the feminism was being about the equal rights with the voting and the careers. However, ever since the female American persons were learning to vote and to have the amusing careers, they have been looking for new reasons to be resentful and dissatisfied.

At first, they were feeling resentful about the actual injustice such as having less money and not enough birth-control and not being encouraged to learn math. Soon, however, the feminist persons were realizing that they were not really feeling very oppressed about these issues, and they began to be afraid they would have to become self-actualized.

Fortunately, somebody--possibly Betty Freidan--discovered they could avoid becoming self-actualized by blaming men for everything. Everybody agreed this was a very good idea. Soon everybody was blaming the masculine persons for everything from the wars to the athlete's feet.

Now, clearly, you are thinking of the new kind of feminism in which, if the female persons are wishing to be extremely selfish and indifferent to other people, they can be saying, "But why should I not have the sex with your husband? After all, I am the feminist," or, "How are you daring to ask me to be calling you on the telephone if I am going to be three hours late for dinner? You are the big, hairy abuser," or possibly, "I will use your sperm to get a baby and then I will take it away and force you to give me all your money so that I am not needing to have the useful work and became self-actualized."

This is not even having to be fair. Fairness is being based on the logic, and logic is masculine, and everything masculine is evil. Now it is being a virtue to be completely irrational and insensitive and to demand that everybody is doing everything that you are wanting.

Bon chance, Mlle. Disappointed, clearly your friends are having the petty and unreasonable attachment to the other kind of feminism in which nobody is betraying anybody and stealing their husbands.