Entertaining the boss

Dear Madame Toujours,

My husband and I are in the middle of a long-running argument that we can't seem to resolve, and I finally begged him to turn to you for advice. He has agreed to abide by your decision, so here is the problem.

Jim's boss, Mr. Dubchuck has been divorced for two years, now. Jim feels sorry for him and keeps inviting him home to eat dinner with us. At first I didn't mind too much, but lately this has gotten out of hand. Jim no longer feels the need to call me before bringing Mr. Dubchuck home with him. One night last month, expecting Jim alone, I met him at the door wearing nothing but a garter belt and a smile. Needless to say, Mr. D. was deeply touched.

I have had enough. I mean, I am sorry for Mr. D. He is certainly sad and lonely, but I am tired of having a relative stranger at our table every night. However, there is a new management job opening at the office, and Jim doesn't want to alienate Mr. D. at least until after the new position is filled. I can't wait that long.

Should Jim risk losing the promotion, or will I have to keep entertaining this man indefinitely? What do you suggest?

Sincerely,
I Want off the Hook

Chere Mme. Hook,

Bien sur, M. Dubchuck, he is wearing out for himself the welcome like the fish that is smelling very bad. However, now that he is feeling very much that he is one of the family, it is being hard to be getting rid of him without giving the offense, which is not the good idea if M. Jim is wanting the new job. For the present time, I am thinking is necessary for you to continue to be the hostess for M. Dubchuck.

Oui, now you are saying, "But Madame Toujours, if this is going on, then I will have to be strangling for myself the husband and poisoning for M. Dubchuck the dinner."

Non, non. You must not be precipitate. What you will do is this. No more will you be having M. Dubchuck to dine alone en famille. From now on, when M. Dubchuck is present, you will entertain. You will throw the grande dinner party. You will invite all of the single women and the divorcees that are in your acquaintance. You will tell them that M. Dubchuck is the big, successful fellow with power and money who is grieving because he has no one to love. Very soon, I am assuring you, M. Dubchuck will be having the very many women to entertain him. M. Jim is not having to give the offense, and you can be lounging about the house in the lingerie as much as you desire.

Bon Chance, Mme. Hook, and consider, the pot-luck; it is very chic, and the ladies, they can be, as you say, auditioning for the gentleman their cooking.